Classic Experiment
In the 1960s, Walter Mischel, a professor of psychology at Stanford University in the United States, designed a famous experiment on "delayed gratification". This experiment is It started in a kindergarten on the campus of Stanford University. Researchers recruited dozens of children and asked each of them to stay alone in a small room with only a table and a chair. The trays on the table contained the children’s favorite things-marshmallows, cookies or It's a biscuit stick. The researchers told them that they could eat the marshmallows right away, or they could get another marshmallow as a reward when the researchers came back. They can also ring the bell on the table, and the researcher will return as soon as he hears the bell. For these children, the experiment process is quite difficult. Some children cover their eyes or turn their backs in order not to look at the tempting marshmallows. Others start to make small movements—kick the table, pull their braids, and some even hit the marshmallows with their hands. . As a result, most of the children gave up in less than three minutes. "Some children ate the candy without even ringing the bell, while others stared at the marshmallows on the table and rang the bell after half a minute." About one-third of the children successfully delayed their desire for marshmallows, and they waited until the researchers came back to honor the reward, which took about 15 minutes.
Experimental analysis
The original purpose of this experiment is to study the psychological process of why some people can "delay gratification" while others can only surrender. However, when Michelle accidentally talked to the three daughters who also participated in the above experiment about the current situation of their kindergarten partners, he discovered that the academic performance of these teenagers had some connection with their ability to "delay gratification" when they were young. Beginning in 1981, Michelle contacted 653 participants who are now high school students one by one, and sent questionnaires to their parents and teachers, focusing on the children's academic performance, ability to deal with problems, and relationships with classmates. Ask a question.
When Michelle analyzed the results of the questionnaire, he found that children who immediately rang the bell at home or school were more likely to have behavior problems and had lower grades. They often have difficulty coping with pressure, lack of concentration, and difficulty maintaining friendships with others. And those children who could wait 15 minutes before eating sweets had an average of 210 points higher in academic performance than those who ate sweets right away.
The experiment did not end here. Michelle and other researchers continued to study the participants of the experiment until they were 35 years old. Studies have shown that people who could not wait have a higher body mass index as adults and are more likely to have drug problems. "But this is what the participants said, and it is inevitable to be somewhat different from their actual behavior in life." Michelle explained.
Last year, Professor Michel, who is now at Columbia University, continued to deepen this research. He selected some participants in the experiment that year and scanned their brains with a functional magnetic resonance imaging device, hoping to find out specific areas of the brain that play a role in the ability of "delayed gratification" by comparing the scans. In addition, researchers have conducted different genetic tests to investigate whether there are genetic factors that control the ability to "delay gratification".
If Michelle and his research team are successful, then you can determine the importance of self-control to success. For decades, psychologists have believed that IQ is the determinant of a person’s success. Michelle believes that the key to whether IQ can work is self-control, even the smartest kids have to complete their homework. "What we tested through the marshmallow experiment is actually self-control ability," Michelle said. "This experiment forces children to find ways to solve problems that are beneficial to them. They all want to get a second marshmallow, but how to do it? Can you get it?"
For the experiment that year, some psychologists believed that whether children were willing to wait depends on their desire for marshmallows. However, it quickly proved that all children were eager to get a second marshmallow. So, what exactly determines the ability of self-control? Through repeated observations of the children's behavior, Michelle concluded that the secret lies in "diverting attention." The children who are willing to wait will not always stare at the cotton candy. They cover their eyes, play hide-and-seek or sing. Their desire for cotton candy is not gone but temporarily forgotten.
In Michelle’s view, this marshmallow experiment is very predictive of the participants’ future. "If some children can control themselves and get more marshmallows, then they can study instead of watching TV," Michel said. "In the future, he will also save more money to support the elderly. He will get more than just Just cotton candy".
In addition, Michelle and colleagues also found that even 19-month-old babies can see differences in the ability to "delay gratification". Take the baby away from the mother and observe how different babies react. As a result, some babies cry immediately, while others can overcome the anxiety of their mothers leaving by diverting their attention, such as playing with toys. When these babies were 5 years old, the researchers did the same experiment with marshmallows. The experiment showed that the children who were crying still couldn't resist the temptation of marshmallows when they grew up.
It is not difficult to conclude that the ability to "delay gratification" is affected by genetic factors. But Michelle is reluctant to draw such a conclusion lightly. He believes that innate factors are as important as nurturing. For example, by doing the same experiment with children of different classes, he found that the "delayed gratification" ability of children from poor families is lower than the average. "Children growing up in poor families have fewer opportunities to deal with'delayed gratification', and if they don’t practice, they can’t find a way to divert their attention," Michelle said. "So acquired training is very important, just like we learn How to use a computer is to learn from mistakes."
However, Michelle found a shortcut to cultivate the ability to "delay gratification". Perhaps this self-control can be cultivated by teaching children to look at marshmallows in different ways, such as treating marshmallows as a painting. He said: "If children realize that they can achieve self-control by learning to shift their attention and thinking, then they have made a big step.
Now, Michelle is preparing for a large-scale experiment. The subjects are 4-8 year-old school students in Philadelphia, Seattle and New York, aiming to prove whether this "delayed gratification" self-control ability can be successfully cultivated through education. Although in previous experiments, Michelle had Imagining marshmallows as clouds prolonged their waiting time, but the durability of this method has yet to be proven. In other words, Michelle wants to know if these little tricks only work during experiments, and whether children can learn them. The methods are used in daily life, such as choosing to watch TV or do homework.
Researchers conducted preliminary experiments in class and found out how to teach children to shift their attention from a psychological perspective, namely By demonstrating the demonstration video tape, let the children learn how to improve self-control ability from the peers in the video tape. Although this method of teaching is very effective, Michelle still has concerns. Because when the students return When you arrive at home, you are faced with a relatively uncontrolled environment, and it is very likely that this experiment will fail. Michelle knows that the most important thing is to let the students turn the method of self-control into a habit. "This is why the role of parents is very important. "Important", he said, "Do parents ask their children to'delay satisfaction' every day? Do you encourage children to wait? Can it prove that it is worth the wait? These are all important. "Michelle pointed out that some small daily rules, such as not eating snacks before dinner, saving pocket money, etc., are cognitive exercises for children and help them develop self-control. But Michelle thinks these informal The practice of is not enough, and the experiment is still going on. (Source: Netease Exploration, I did not expect this experiment to be followed for so long, thank the researchers and translators)
This experiment explains: Those can be delayed Satisfied children have stronger self-control ability. They can appropriately control and adjust their behavior without external supervision, restrain impulse, resist temptation, and persevere in ensuring the realization of their goals.
Function and Goal
The so-called delayed gratification is what we usually call "endurance." In order to pursue a bigger goal and obtain greater enjoyment, you can restrain your desires and give up the temptation in front of you. "Delayed gratification" It is not simply to let children learn to wait, nor to suppress their desire blindly, nor to let children "experience wind and rain without seeing the rainbow". In the final analysis, it is the ability to overcome current difficult situations and strive to obtain long-term benefits.
Delayed gratification is one of the manifestations of children’s self-control, which reflects whether a child can control his immediate impulse for more valuable long-term results and give up the choice of immediate gratification when facing various temptations Orientation, and the self-control ability displayed during the waiting period. Delayed gratification is not only the core component and the most important skill of children’s self-control, but also an important component of children’s socialization and emotional regulation. Positive personality factors are an important sign of children’s transition from immaturity to maturity and from dependence to independence.
Children with a strong ability to delay gratification are more likely to develop stronger social competitiveness and higher jobs in the future And learning efficiency; have a strong self-confidence, can better cope with the setbacks, pressures and difficulties in life; when pursuing their goals, they can resist the temptation of immediate satisfaction, and achieve long-term and more valuable Goals.
If the ability to delay gratification is insufficiently developed, the above-mentioned qualities will be lacking in the future development tendency, and some bad behaviors may occur, such as watching TV while doing homework, looking around doing small movements during class, and leaving school After being playful and not going home, sleeping and getting out of bed, etc.; relatively more people are prone to irritability, lack of patience, and psychological problems; after entering puberty, they tend to be shy, withdrawn, stubborn, indecisive and indecisive in social interactions; easy to encounter setbacks Distracted, withdrawn or at a loss when faced with pressure.
The ability of self-control is the ability of an individual to properly control and regulate his own behavior, restrain impulse, and resist temptation without external supervision. The comprehensive ability of delaying gratification, and persevering in the realization of goals is a manifestation of willpower. It is an important component of our self-awareness and an important psychological quality for a person to succeed. In life, some people often Give up leisure activities on weekends or evenings and concentrate on work. Don’t they know how to have fun? This is actually a manifestation of delayed gratification. In order to guarantee the life after retirement, saving part of the income now or using it for reinvestment is also a manifestation of delayed gratification. In order to have a healthy body, not to smoke, not to drink, not to overeating, this also requires the ability to delay gratification.
People have different goals, some of which are more distant. To accomplish distant goals requires hard work. When the goal is completed, the rewards are also great. But to accomplish the goal, you have to pay a price, such as giving up instant enjoyment and restraining your behavior. Sometimes in order to achieve the goal, some relatively monotonous work must be completed first. In order to become a lawyer, you have to remember the law first. People tend to get tired when they are engaged in these monotonous jobs, and even feel disgusted when faced with boring work. At this time, some activities that can make people get instant pleasure have become a great temptation. It is understandable if you find a little pastime in the boring work. However, if you lack the willpower, and whenever you encounter the temptation of the outside world, you will put aside your study or work and pursue instant enjoyment, which will make it difficult to accomplish your goals.
Research status
In the past 30 years, research on delayed gratification in the laboratory that reproduces this kind of life prototype has attracted extensive attention from personality psychologists. A lot of discussion and empirical research have been carried out in aspects such as measurement and research methods. Domestic psychology researchers have also begun to pay attention to this special psychological phenomenon in recent years. Huang Yunzhi wrote an article that delayed gratification is a research project worth developing in our country, and introduced the research status and development trends in this field as a guide. Hope this research Able to obtain fruitful fruits on Chinese soil. At the same time, the cross-cultural research practice of self-delayed gratification has also begun to land in China. The new progress in temperament research has promoted domestic researchers from another aspect to study the temperament of young children in unfamiliar and stressful situations. To the extent of the research, the researchers boldly adopted delayed experimental tasks to delay gratification. Research has begun to show its signs in China. 7Db Suzhou Education Edition High School Chinese Teaching Net-Children's Learning Resource Center
Because the domestic research on delayed gratification is still in its initial stage, the concept of delayed gratification, structural analysis, theoretical discussion, research methods and psychological mechanism are still in the initial stage. There is still a lack of sufficient localized research practices in aspects such as related personalities. Most of these studies are cross-cultural comparative studies or confirmatory studies conducted abroad. The limitations of research have shown different research paradigms.
Typical Paradigm
GiftDelay Paradigm (GiftDelay)
Gift Delay is mainly designed by Funder, Block and colleagues. A delayed experimental task used. The specific experiment level is as follows ----
The experimenter showed the preschool children a wrapped gift and said in surprise: "Look, what I found here! This is a gift for you! I'm guessing what it is? I put the sutra here (on the right side of the child, out of reach of the child), and when you have completed this puzzle, you can get the gift." Continue the experiment The author began to describe this "circus puzzle" and helped the children complete the puzzle task (finished in 4 minutes). When the child is doing the jigsaw puzzle, the gift is still within the child’s sight. When the puzzle was completed, the experimenter was busy sorting out his papers (90 seconds). If the child does not take the gift spontaneously within the 90-second delay period after completing the puzzle task, the experimenter puts down the paper in his hand and tells the child: "Okay, you can take the gift now." During the 4 minutes of the puzzle and the 90-second delay after completing the puzzle, the experimenter should record all the verbal and physical behaviors of the subjects pointing to the gift. Delay score includes 4 standardized behavior indicators: delay time, verbal behavior pointing to the gift; physical behavior pointing to the gift; delayed behavior when opening the gift (open immediately, or on the way back to kindergarten, or put the gift in the cabinet and bring it back Home).
The measurement of delayed gratification behavior for gifts reflects the degree of impulse control that children resist not taking gifts and opening gifts. In this research paradigm, individual differences in delayed behavior should reflect the relatively real tendency of individuals to over-control themselves.
Self-delayed gratification paradigm
The self-delayed gratification experimental paradigm is another typical model designed and used by social cognitive psychologists and colleagues Delay satisfies the experimental research paradigm, also known as the "choice" delay paradigm, or Mischel paradigm. After a lot of empirical research, Mischel et al. gradually established the experimental paradigm of delayed gratification two-stage structure.
The general level of the research paradigm is: First, the experimenter and the participant do some warm-up games in the laboratory. Subsequently, the experimenter showed the participants two rewards, such as: a gummy and two gummy; or a 2-inch-long pretzel and two pretzels, allowing the participants to receive two rewards of varying amounts. Make a preference choice between objects (the first stage-delayed choice), and then the experimenter tells the subject that he has something to do and needs to leave the room for a while, and then says: "If you can wait until I come back, you can eat this —— (point to the reward chosen by the participant), can only eat this—— (point to the reward not chosen by the participant)”. After being convinced that the subjects understood the contingency relationship, the experimenter left the room and recorded the children's delay time and delay waiting strategy through the one-way glass (the second stage-delay maintenance). The experimenter returned after 15 minutes, or after the child rang the bell or violated the rules.
In contrast, children in the SID situation are faced with a sad dilemma: On the one hand, if the subject wants to obtain their preferred reward, they have to face temptation and interference. It is difficult to wait for the task; on the other hand, the subjects do not need to wait for the instant rewards that are available immediately, but it is not their favorite. The delayed task contains this complex and conflicting contingency structure is the main feature of the SID experimental paradigm. In addition, the entire delay behavior is goal-oriented, starting from target selection, going through an effective delay maintenance process, and ending with a delay reward goal. The delayed behavior measured by SID reflects a kind of self-regulation ability of individuals in a competitive stress situation.
Training method
ABCD method
Mr. Qian Zhongshu has such a passage about eating grapes in "The Besieged City", "There is a bunch of grapes, optimism Those who want to eat must start with the worst grape, and continue to eat the best grape, leaving hope forever ahead; pessimism is on the contrary, the more grapes you eat, the worse you eat, until you eat despair."
In fact, the latter type of people often cannot tolerate delayed gratification. They must experience gratification and happiness immediately, even if doing so will overspend the future. In life, some people like to do what they like first, and always put the things they don’t like to the end. It’s like eating grapes, picking good ones first, but the sweet grapes always disappear so fast. Faced with the sour fruit, the previous goodness disappears in a blink of an eye, and there is no courage and motivation to face the problem that must be solved. . Not only is the "sweetness" in front of me even harder to swallow, but there is no temptation or reward to look forward to anymore. This way of life not only allows us to start with happiness and end with pain, but also cause endless evasion and procrastination. Today’s sweet grapes are finished, we will look for sweet apples, sweet pineapples, and even advances tomorrow or begging for someone else. In short, just don’t face the endgame.
Psychological research has shown that delayed gratification is an ability that everyone can learn. It is possible through constant practice to learn to find a balance between eating good grapes or bad grapes first.
The ABCD method has been proven to effectively help us enhance our ability to delay gratification, where A represents behavior, B represents the present, C represents the future, and D represents the strategy of change. For example, your current behavior is "delay in doing things". The advantage is that you can do the work you like first, but the problems and troubles that await you in the future are headaches and troubles for you. So what are the strategies for change? Let's take a look at what the last third of the children in the "cotton candy" experiment did. Some of them close their eyes or sleep with their heads and arms, trying to "isolate" from the marshmallows in front of them. Therefore, one of the important strategies for cultivating delayed gratification is to keep away from the rewards that distract us, such as putting difficult tasks or meetings ahead of schedule when planning, or prioritizing deadlines for these matters with others, or Put the work you don't like on the table and lock the work you like in the drawer. In the "Marshmallow Experiment", some children used self-talking or singing to divert their attention and kill time to restrain their desires. By diverting our attention, we can also make us less attracted to immediate temptations. For example, focusing on the work itself can reduce the resistance generated by negative emotions when doing our headache work, or listening to a little soothing music. In addition, it is also an effective incentive to specify the long-term consequences of short-term gratification or the benefits of delayed gratification, such as posting the rewards you can get after solving a problem on the computer.
In fact, the above strategy can also be used for many other aspects that need to cultivate delayed gratification, such as keeping your credit card at home and carrying only some change in your pocket, or cutting off the network when you concentrate on writing a report. Find satisfaction in gossip; next time you want to chew potato chips regardless of your weight, get up and do some housework or talk to people around you next time you want to smoke; post pictures of teeth blackened by cigarettes or PS on the wall A very slender picture of himself is placed at the table.
Delayed gratification is not to say "no" to happiness, but to help us achieve a balance between short-term happiness and long-term gains, making life sweeter and sweeter.
(The author Wang Bing is a PhD in mental health from Peking University, and is currently the chief researcher of the Asian Institute of Positive Psychology)
Token Law
Applicable to children. When the child is a little older, parents can agree with the child that if they buy a new toy, they will exchange it with the "five-pointed star" they have accumulated. "Five-pointed star" is the "reward" that children usually get when they perform well. Generally, after the child has accumulated 5 or 10 times, his needs can be met. Every time a child gets a "reward", the process is a kind of waiting. The standards for rewards given by mom and dad must be unified every time, and principle must not be lost.
Ability training
How to cultivate the baby's ability to delay gratification in life? The so-called delay is to let the baby learn to wait and wait patiently. To this end, you should start with the short-term "not responding" to your baby's needs, and then gradually delay the response time based on your baby's ability to accept it. Otherwise, if you let the baby wait for 10 minutes at the beginning, he will definitely not have any desire for self-control, and crying, making noise and other "demonstration" behaviors will be inevitable. When you first try, your baby will inevitably take some "demonstration" behaviors. At this time, you must not "unconditionally surrender" immediately because of distress. Hold on cruelly, from instant gratification to delayed gratification always requires a process. As long as the baby can wait for a short period of time, and does not cry or make trouble during the waiting time, this is self-control. Think about it, your persistence will exchange your baby's patience, is it worth it?
In a moral sense, delaying gratification is an act of self-discipline. But babies are still very young, and their behavior training often needs to pass "heteronomy" (that is, other people's requirements and supervision) to achieve delayed gratification. At this time, you should divert your baby's attention from his needs as much as possible. For example, if he has eaten a lot of grapes, but still wants to eat, you can use his favorite toys to divert his attention. Babies between 2 and 3 years old can easily divert their attention. Soon, you will find that he is having a good time and laughs. So, does this transfer method always work? As the baby gets older, he may "not eat this set". At that time, we also need to consciously train and supervise his self-discipline (that is, the ability to delay gratification through self-control). Regardless of the technique used, the most critical principle is to no longer "response to any request." Only in this way can the baby's delayed gratification ability be continuously cultivated and exercised and become a mentally healthy baby.
Educator Rousseau said to parents in "Emile": "Do you know any way to make your child suffer? That is: one hundred obedience and one hundred shun." Baiyi hundred shun, It's useless to deal with children on demand. Letting children learn to wait and delay gratification is the foundation of a lifetime of happiness. Delayed gratification refers to the tendency of individuals to give up timely gratification for more valuable long-term results, and the self-control ability shown in waiting. The famous "candy experiment" also shows that children who are good at regulating their emotions and behaviors and can delay gratification have a better level of mental health and a greater chance of success.
Of course, delayed gratification is not simply about letting children learn to wait or suppress desire, but an ability to overcome current difficulties and obtain long-term benefits. In the 2-3 year old version of the growth story book "I want to eat it" in the July issue of "Buqi Fun Paradise" by the Children's Development Center of Foreign Research Institute, Buqi controlled his desire to eat a cherry and succeeded With a tree full of cherries, his example encourages children to learn self-control, learn to restrain their desires in time, and obtain longer-term or greater gains.
To cultivate children's ability to "delay gratification" is inseparable from parents' encouragement. When young children try to "refresh" their records in accordance with the requirements of adults, parents must affirm the children and give them some small rewards so that they can get the motivation to persist. In addition, if the child insists on obtaining timely gratification, parents should not force the child to insist on deliberately, because it is difficult for young babies to consciously control their desires.
To love children, we must cultivate the qualities that make them happy. Let children learn to restraint, learn to expect, learn to be grateful, learn to cherish, learn to struggle, and experience the joy of success and happiness in life.